I’m letting resistance get in my way.

I mentioned the other day in a video that I’ve had a major flare up of eczema on my hand. My fingers are sore and itchy right on the spots of highest friction in my day to day activities so there is no avoiding irritation. The knuckle on my pointer finger is swollen and tender and twice the size of the other one.

This eczema on my hand showed up for the first time in conjunction with my severe acne breakout. It finally died along along with the last of my acne when I got checked for allergies, which seemed to put the cherry on top of my new found healthy lifestyle. Within three weeks, both the remaining acne and remaining eczema disappeared.

Since then, I’ve had a couple eczema sores here and there, but nothing like this. I feel blessed that the skin on my face has not followed suit to any crazy degree, but I am realizing that now is the time to tighten up my lifestyle a bit, recheck on my allergies, and basically do some spring cleaning.

But I’m having major resistance.

Something is stopping me from picking up that phone and making an appointment with the naturopath.

In fact, I don’t even think it’s actually about the acne, or about the eczema. I think it’s about the fact that I’m being lazy! I don’t WANT to have to tighten things up, or rearrange my diet. It’s healthy enough, but I guess there is something that needs to be changed. It’s just pure frustration that I can’t pig out on chocolates several days a week and get away with it.

But then again, maybe it’s not allergens. I haven’t been exercising much or meditating either. Agh. More things to add in.

Let’s face it… change, even if you know exactly what to do, can seem threatening. It involves personal risk. We all love our comfort zones.

But resistance doesn’t get you anywhere, and it actually creates emotional disease.

It makes the change that much harder and undermines your goals.

Recognizing, understanding and lowering your resistance are essential before trying to motivate yourself to put a plan into action. Otherwise, you will experience a major rift between the good intentions in your head (that you should change) and the feelings in your heart (that you don’t want to).

I have a secret to tell you – I cry a lot. Every time I get emotionally frustrated, I burst into tears. But I actually feel a lot better about whatever I’m crying about after I cry about it – for example, last night I broke down about my resistance to this new change while doing a jigsaw puzzle with my boyfriend.

I knew what I was crying about – I identified it, came to an understanding with myself, and now I feel as though I can go ahead with my plans for a healthier me ♥

Photo by EssJayNZ