Last week, we talked about how a lot of people who eat healthy to clear their skin actually have a very unhealthy relationship with food.
They’re scared to make any mistakes with food. They’re terrified of eating anything unhealthy, ever. Even if it’s a dessert with their family at Mother’s Day, or a slice of cake at their own wedding.
There are many people in the world who just eat healthy without making it into a big ordeal, but with acne, there is so much emotion involved that it makes eating healthy into something that is very stressful; neurotic; full of guilt and fear.
I think it’s much healthier (for your skin and sanity) to not be so strict about food; it’s better to get to a point where you eat healthy most of the time but don’t feel deprived. Just relax a little!
But no matter how much I say that, it won’t make a difference unless you find a way to heal the emotions behind the behaviour and release that fear. Because it is truly about the fear; not the food.
As I was saying in the last article, the only reason that I can now be lenient with my diet without freaking out about it is because I finally emotionally healed from that fear. I used to be terrified of breaking the “rules” with my diet. Just terrified.
So how did I get over it and manage to repair my relationship with food?
As I said in the last article, emotional healing is an individual journey and there’s no one path to success.
I realized this article could get seriously long if I wrote out every thing you could try, so instead I’ve decided to write about how I personally managed to heal my relationship with food. Next article, I’ll give you some additional things you could try out.
Stopped Reading About Health on The Internet So Much

There’s probably nothing that contributes to neurotic eating like reading a bunch of different opinions from a bunch of different people on the internet about what’s “healthy”.
Nobody, and I mean nobody, can agree on this. Every time you get online, you discover a new diet that is the BEST one, or another evil food group that you must stop eating if you want to avoid certain disaster.
It gets to the point where you feel like you can’t eat anything because you just don’t know what’s right and who’s right.
How are you supposed to not be neurotic?
Again, this is a tricky thing because it’s not like I never learned anything useful and beneficial on the internet when it comes to food and nutrition, but it got to a point for me where it was like “I HATE THIS!! EVERYBODY JUST SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR STUPID DIETS!!” (paraphrased).
So I stopped regularly reading about diet and nutrition, and decided to eat more “intuitively”.
This may have been the single biggest thing that allowed me to heal my relationship with food. I guarantee I would still be neurotic about food if I still actively researched nutrition all the time like a hobby.
I Started Actually Eating Junk Food Sometimes
I believe that the shortest route (and possibly the only route) to overcoming your fears is by doing the thing that scares you the most. And yeah, it’s going to suck at first, but eventually doing that thing won’t be so scary anymore.
So what’s the answer to this scared-of-bad-food dilemma?
Eating it.
See, I used to avoid anything I deemed to be unhealthy like the plague. Nothing of the sort would ever cross my lips. Unhealthy food was on this evil, untouchable pedestel which would spit acne at me if I ever touched it. At least in my mind.
I was downright scared of it.
So to get over that, I had to face that fear and start purposely eating some unhealthy food, and show myself that I would live.
I went slow with this at first, but it did work over time as I got more comfortable with being lenient. It turns out that I did live, and my skin is fine. And now unhealthy food isn’t so terrifying anymore.
Being Aware of the Fear & Challenging It
Another way in which I feel contributed to my healing was that I always tried to stay aware of my thought processes and how they may be potentially unhealthy.
If you have a problem in your life like this one, it’s always a good idea to take a look inside of yourself and sort out what is the root of the issue truly is.
With this problem, it might be easy to blame the food or the people around you or society, but when you look inside you can see that it’s the fear of acne talking.
And why are you afraid of acne? Because it makes you feel ashamed and unloveable.
And how can you keep those feelings away from you? By controlling acne, and you feel like you can control acne if you just perfectly control your food.
You have to be aware of these patterns in yourself and how they’re unhealthy and contributing to your miserable-ness. Otherwise you can’t challenge them, and they won’t ever change. If you’re not very good at self awareness, meditation can help you become more in tune with yourself.
And once I was aware of these patterns in myself, how did I challenge them?
I feel like for me it was mostly through The Love Vitamin. I have shared every inch of my acne journey with you here, exploring every last nook and cranny of my emotional acne experience, including all the uncomfortable stuff.
It’s been very cathartic, and gives me an avenue to share and mentally challenge myself (and also practically challenge myself as in the above point about eating junk food).
Of course, not everyone is going to publicly blog their way to emotional freedom, but just journalling is an excellent parallel alternative.
Getting Reiki Sessions
Whether you’re into energy healing or not is your own prerogative, but after several years of struggling with the lingering emotional pain and subsequent food relationship problem, I decided to go see a local reiki master in my town who I had heard great things about.
I was always interested in energy healing, but had never really done anything like it before, so it was an exciting experiment to see if it could help me finally shift that fear out of my life.
I had four sessions over four weeks, and it was a great experience. I really enjoyed it, and I loved spending time with her.
At the time and immediately after, I couldn’t definitively say “yes this worked” (and really, I still can’t definitively say that), but looking back now, those sessions exactly coincide with what I realize now is when the fear really disappeared.
It’s been more than a year and a half now and I can definitely 100% say that the fear was way different prior to those sessions, and has been pretty much gone ever since then.
So was it definitely the reiki that caused the change?
I don’t know for sure… I feel like I had been working up to a big shift (via all the things I mentioned above), but I like to think the reiki had something to do with cementing these changes in my “energetic being”, or whatever you want to call it.
Le Video
httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0ixMgc7Tyc
Do you have any tips about healing an unhealthy relationship with food? Share in the comments below!
23 Responses
My only comment about eating “junk” food is that some of us need to avoid it – like it’s an addiction. I can’t have just one piece of cake without spiraling and eating refined sugars non-stop for the next day or two. Refined sugars to my brain are like cocaine (research actually show refined sugar to be 8 times more addictive than cocaine in studies done on rats!). I do, however, think there is total validity in your statement though! I developed a border line eating disorder when it came to food and my acne and it drove me nuts! Now, I will pick french fries off my boyfriends plate and, guess what, I’m still acne free! The stress from being so anal about eating perfectly will just spike cortisol, which does nothing good for acne or your body. Great article!
Hi Amanda! 🙂 Yes there are exceptions for each individual and everyone needs to interpret this for their own situation! With the sugar thing for me though… interestingly enough I found that sugar felt so much more addictive back when I wouldn’t let myself eat any of it. If I did start eating it back then, it was very hard to stop… and yes, felt like a drug! I JUST WANT MORE!! AAAH!! But now, it doesn’t feel anywhere near as addictive, probably because I know that I can just eat it whenever I want, so when I do eat it I don’t feel the unstoppable urge to binge on it. That’s what I found anyway 🙂 Also, I’m stoked you found your balance and relaxed about food and stayed clear! Way to go!
Largely thanks to your blog and Fran’s blog (I first found out about your blog when you guest blogged on hers)! And thanks to Estroblock! Even though I’m almost totally clear I still love reading your blog though. Thanks for all you do!
How long did it take you to overcome the fear? Until your skin was cleared and then you ate junk food?
Hi Jessica! About two to three years! But that’s just my experience, I wouldn’t take that as any kind of expectation for what you will or won’t go through on your own journey
Hi Tracy! I’m a new Love Vitamin reader, I find your site really helpful and supportive, but only in small doses, because I have found that reading into everything too much can cause paranoia, as you were saying in your article. I cleaned up my diet about six months ago, actually by following a book called The Healthy Skin Diet by Karen Fischer. Have you heard of it? I had to cut out gluten as I found out it was causing cystic acne on my cheeks. Now I just get a few spots around my period and have a very clogged up forehead! I was using the dreaded Benzoyl (actually Duac) just on my forehead up until three weeks ago. Of course stopping it caused the worst breakout of my life. So anyway, I feel like cleaning up my diet, taking fish oil, evening primrose oil, and probiotics has ALMOST cleared my acne. But, still a small problem on my cheeks and the forehead post Benzoyl. I know you still had a small problem until you took Estroblock. I just am not sure about taking it because I don’t know my specific hormonal imbalance. Also, you and lots of girls seemed to have acne on the chin, whereas I NEVER get a spot on my chin. How strange is that?! Sorry for the essay….thanks for creating such a safe, informative place for me and everyone else to come to!!! x
Hi Jen! No I haven’t heard of that book, but really glad to hear things have improved so much for you! Yes, estroblock helped me clear up that last bit, can’t make the same promises for everyone but it does seem to work well for many. Hormonal acne is usually around the chin and mouth, but there are always exceptions so I can’t say it won’t work for you!
Great article – I definitely agree that loosening the reigns, so to speak, helps a lot. I’ve restricted my diet several times for different regimens…first it was very little carbs, then it was excluding things to address food sensitivities, and recently it’s been trying to eat a low FODMAP diet to address gut issues. Every single time, I feel deprived and at some point, end up eating way too much sugar in one sitting. All that to say, feeling restricted in what I can and can’t eat ALWAYS backfires for me. Even though I know sugar & dairy are not good for acne, my stance is that you have to be able to live with what you’re eating. I can definitely live without a ton of processed sugar, but I do have a sweet tooth – always have, probably always will – so I want to be able to eat fruit, and even some desserts on occasion. I’m still trying to figure out what the best balance is for my body & skin, but I think overall, the moral of the story is to just eat a balanced diet, period – keep it simple!
Hi Emily – totally agree! Keep it simple. The internet makes us want to make it so complicated it can make us crazy… and yes when you start feeling deprived, that’s when you start binging which is never great!
I totally can relate to this Tracy. I am petite like you too, and I can eat anything and not gain weight – BUT “eating anything” was one of the factors causing my acne. So when I discovered this, I had the same fear of food like you mentioned in the post and started being neurotic on food, especially because my wedding was coming soon! I too was annoyed like Chelsea, how some people can eat at McD and not have skin problems (I was also jealous of brides without acne who look flawless in their make-up). But thankfully those days are over now. These days I eat everything in moderation, but make sure I have my daily glass of green smoothie and a portion of greens and fruits. I’ve also realized that one of the keys to good skin is to detox properly (sleeping right, drinking enough water and so on). You can eat what you want but if your body doesn’t detox properly that’s when the toxins start coming out to your face. Great article Tracy!
Hi Mardhiah!
Yes I agree, how well you can tolerate being lenient with your food usually comes down to whether or not – yes your body can detox, but also stress, sleep, etc! And digestion too. These things are like your insurance policy so you can relax a bit on the food 🙂
Traci-
All I can say is WOW. You summed up exactly how I feel in one blog post. I never thought that I had a problem with food until I realized how scared I was of it. I thought I was just being healthy, but it started getting so out of control when I would give up times with friends because I didn’t want to go out to eat with them. I am now dealing with it though and I just want to say thank you for putting into words when I could not!
Hi Michele, really glad this article resonated with you! It’s something a lot of us acne victims go through!
Hello Tracy. It’s summer here where I live, and it’s getting really hot and humid. My routine is the same, my diet stays the same yet I’m breaking out like crazy in small red bumps. Do you think it is because of the weather? And how can I improve my skin? 🙁
Hi Chi,
You know to be honest, I don’t know what the best thing to do about hot & humid acne is. My skin is the opposite and likes humid weather so I just don’t have direct experience with it – my only advice would be to follow the same holistic health stuff that I encourage for regular types of acne. But beyond that, I’m not sure. However, I’m going to make your question into it’s own blog post and ‘Ask the Readers’ their opinions and advice.
Hi Tracy and the readers, here’s a recent NY Times article on our excessive overwashing. The comments, as always, are even more interesting than the article.
http://www.nytimes.com/2014/05/25/magazine/my-no-soap-no-shampoo-bacteria-rich-hygiene-experiment.html?action=click&contentCollection=Health®ion=Footer&module=MoreInSection&pgtype=Blogs
Hi Nebulae, ah yes, very interesting. Science is catching on 😉 yes I always find the comments about these sort of things interesting. I don’t think most are ready to get over the mental hurdles of bacteria on their bodies being okay and even a good thing. On the whole our society is so conditioned to excessive washing, it’s difficult to change that mindset
Hi Tracy,
First off, I’m a big fan of your blog. However, this post leaves me conflicted. On one hand, I completely understand that it’s important to maintain a healthy relationship with food, even in the face of acne/gut struggles. On the other hand, any time I eat anything “unclean,” I get inflammation and acne that leaves me regretting it for days or weeks or months. And it’s more than just the appearance of having acne. The pain/discomfort is far worse. So 98% of the time I choose a “clean” diet, even if, as you say, it might be contributing to an unhealthy relationship with food. I have little desire to stop reading about nutrition on the internet and to force myself to eat junk food when my number one priority is to make my acne go away.
Maybe I should reread this blog post in six months or a year, after I have successfully cleared my acne, but possibly replaced the acne with an unhealthy relationship with food. Perhaps this is the sequence that it takes to heal acne, and I have only reached step 2, while this blog post addresses step 4?
1. Have acne
2. Fix acne through nutrition
3. Become overly obsessed/fearful of food
4. Fix fear of food
Hi Lis, yep I understand where you’re coming from. And yes. It’s complicated and not very clear cut. I guess this post would be a number 4 on your list – because it is addressed at people who have already developed an unhealthy relationship with food. But your comment makes it sound like you have to develop an unhealthy relationship with food in order to clear your skin – which I don’t know. I think in many cases people could clear their skin just as well by eating healthy but not being so strict and stressed about it (because by not eating perfectly, but lowering their stress about it, it all balances out if you know what I mean). However, everyone is an individual with different reactions – there are people who find that they literally cannot “relax” their diet at all, because they literally do break out quite obviously every time they do (sounds like this is you). I’ve written a blog post that I will publish next week about this situation.
Hi Tracy,
Firstly, thank you so much for what you do. You have helped me more than any expensive naturopath or medical article ever could. Your advice is the only thing that has helped me begin to heal my acne. My question is, how can I possibly start to undo obsessive thinking about food if I’m still at the point where I DO break out every time I indulge? I’ve been on a strict anti-inflammatory diet for months now (no sugar, gluten, dairy, soy, eggs, corn, coffee, conventionally raised meat…) When I break the diet, I break out. And I feel guilty and ashamed that I thought I could get away with it. Will there ever come a time when my skin is not so sensitive and I will be able to “cheat” without obvious negative results?
Ah, you know what? I just saw your reply to another reader and you answered my question. I hope I can find the blog post about it you were referring to!
Hi Titi, I think it was this one that you were looking for? https://thelovevitamin.com/14263/stop-acne-unhealthy-food/
Yes that is the one! Thank you so much for your amazingly prompt reply, Tracy. You da best.